“I’m Off to See My Wizard”

“I’m off to see my ‘Wizard’,

because she gave me the answer that I had been searching for a very long time.”

I know that doesn’t fit into the Wizard of Oz tune very well, but work with me.

The Pioneer Woman, AKA Ree Drummond, has just released a new cookbook and I have big plans to go to a book signing in Chicago. Whether I will actually make it or not to see her, is iffy. My husband and I will need to meet up there separately and traffic could keep him delayed. But, I cleverly purchased my ticket late in the process so that my number in line would be so far back that I might still be there at midnight, but that means I may actually make it to the signing. I am guessing that long after my husband made it to Chicago and the kids are snuggled into a hotel bed with sweet dreams of the pool, I will still be waiting to meet Ree.


I will take it and I am very very excited for this moment!

book signing

(This is her previous cookbook because the new one is waiting for me in Chicago.)

I have wanted my own business for as long as I can remember, but what, oh what would it be? I like to do a lot of things a little bit.

Enter, The Pioneer Woman AKA Ree Drummond.

When I discovered her a few years ago as she started coming on to the cooking channels that I so lovingly and desperately watched while I was home with wee wee wee ones (no soap shows for me!) I also began reading her blog. I liked her for her silliness, her happiness and her desire to live an imperfectly perfect life just as I prefer to live (“just like perfect”, right?).

But, mostly, she has been a secret mentor showing me that I can create a “business” piece by piece as it fits my life and my interests. A little bit of lots of things – magnificent!

She is my wizard. I was seeking an answer and she gave me one.

Hokie, I know.

And thanks to her, that is exactly what I am working on these days and I am so excited to finally know what I want to “be” when I grow up and to have a direction for all of my interests. I do not need to leave any of them behind.

Naturally, I have made a gift bag of goodies for her. I am picturing the security guards will not let me bring it in and I will have to hide it somewhere and slip her a note with the coordinates, which would then trigger the security guards to escort me out for delivering my secret note.

My teeth are whitened (and very sensitive now) and my roots have been touched up. “It ain’t easy being beautiful!”

But what do I wear?

I do not wear civilian clothes most days since I am a stay-at-home momma who is usually staying at home. Even getting groceries or diapers does not call for getting gussied up when I am going right back home to work at home. Civilian clothes hamper the movements that I need in my stay-at-home job and they get needlessly messy. It’s like a painter wearing slacks, a button down shirt and a tie to go paint. It doesn’t make sense. When I do have to wear civilian clothes, it takes a large amount of effort to make an outfit. What currently fits? Yoga pants are forgiving, normal pants and jeans are not. What am I gonna do with my hair? I feel like meeting my secret business mentor is almost on par with meeting my secret teen crush, Jon Bon Jovi.


At least my meeting my secret mentor allows me to work out of my existing closet selection. Meeting my secret teen crush would require a whole team of fashion experts to get me ready. And plenty of other personal experts too.

I have never been to a book signing. Do you need to come up with something for them to write in your book? That seems so awkward. But I do not want to miss out on a moment to have my secret mentor add something witty about my new ventures, or something fabulously odd, “just because”.

I have always enjoyed the saying, “Don’t let your meat loaf”. When I left one of my jobs, I stuck a sticky note far in the back of my empty desk drawer where I wrote the saying that cracks me up so much. I still chuckle about it. Until now, I never knew that it had a specific meaning. I thought it was just a silly ambiguous saying about being lazy or something, and it was really fun to say. When my husband made a recent reference to it being something other than simply silly, I decided to “Google it”. It is about being lazy, in a sense, but it is also inappropriate. You’ll have to Google it yourself for the meaning, this is a clean site people.

Dagnabit. That would be a perfect quote for a cookbook signing. Ya know, “meatloaf”.

She and I are of similar age so how about, “Bring back big hair!” We’re 80’s chicks.

How about, “Long live the 3 B’s…bacon, butter and brown sugar!” – since she is a fellow “3 B” lover.

I could have her write the motto that I created for my next adventures in my dream world, but that seems too sincere. I like silly. I want to laugh when I look at it, not gush.

I could use, “You are what you eat” because it is a cookbook signing and because I love to write that after I share a recipe containing nuts. I always get a chuckle out of myself for that one and my kids even know that I am gonna say it when nuts are present. But written out of context, just the phrase all by itself, seems flat. It does not portray the exact sentiment, humor.

Insert Cliff Hanger here: I know you’ll be hanging on the edge of your seats to see the final results. Stay tuned…


book signing

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